Swiper No Swiping
by EmilyHalpert
Summary: The Office  Dorafied. Dwight is on a mission to find Michael's thingy!


A/N: One too many _Dora The Explorer_ episodes inspired this. **WildBerryJam **was awesome in helping out with this.

I don't own The Office, I don't own Dora, so whatever. Don't sue.

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Michael rushed out into the bullpen. "My thingy is gone! My thingy is gone!" he shouted.

Jim looked at him amused. "Your… thingy?"

"Yes, my thingy. You pull on it and it gets bigger." Michael demonstrated with his hands. "See, bigger. And then smaller."

Jim could barely contain his excitement. "So you have a… thingy. And it gets bigger and smaller when you pull on it."

"No, Jim… I _had_ a thingy. I was playing with it yesterday. I went home, and left it on my desk. Somebody stole it. The last person in my office was – "

"You?"

"Shut it. It was Toby! He's always wanted that thingy. I know it. He took it! Toby!"

Dwight jumped up, ready to help. "It could be anywhere between here and the annex. We must investigate. Can I help?"

"Yes, Dwight. Get right on that. Priority."

Dwight grabbed his backpack, always prepared, and looked around. "The thingy is in the annex with Toby. To get to the annex, we must first cross the room. Then we will travel through the dangerous kitchen. The most important part of all will be to avoid the chatty Kelly. Then, we shall find Toby and the thingy in the annex."

Michael lost interest. "Whatever. Just get it back."

Dwight carefully examined the room around him. "To get to the kitchen, I need to pass that plant. I must use my trusty shovel to dig through the dirt. Or else the plant may attack."

Dwight found his shovel in his backpack, and proceeded to dig through the soil.

"Dwight! Stop it! Leave the plant alone!" Karen yelled at Dwight.

"Karen, if you knew anything, you would know that this variety of plant, Officitis Plantus, is the most dangerous plant commonly found in offices. It often springs out to attack unwitting victims. The only surefire way to stop it is to disturb its natural habitat."

Karen sighed and turned back to work.

Dwight finished digging up the plant, and carefully crept by the sneaky plant. He did it! He made it past the plant, and the plant hadn't attacked! He then ran to the kitchen, and glanced inside. Ryan was inside. From past experience, Dwight knew that Ryan was likely to start a fire inside the kitchen. This was not the time to risk a fire – not when Michael's thingy was in danger. Dwight again rummaged through his backpack and pulled out what he needed – a fire blanket. Guaranteed to keep him safe amongst the flames.

Dwight wrapped himself up, and ventured through the kitchen. Ryan seemed to have the toaster oven under control, but there was no time to waste. He hurried through the kitchen, and glanced out the door. Kelly was talking to Toby; this would be tricky.

But he had already made it through the dangerous bullpen and across the fiery kitchen; he would not turn back now.

Dwight debated his options. He could wait until Kelly left, but, knowing Kelly, that could be a while, and Ryan was already looking at him strangely. He knew what his only option was. He dug out his cell phone and called Kelly's desk. As soon as it started ringing, Kelly rushed back to her desk. He hung up his phone, and entered the annex.

"You! Toby! Give it up. I know you have it." Dwight accused Toby, who as always, looked confused and a bit sad.

"What is it now Dwight?"

"You took Michael's thingy. Who else could it be? I know it was you, just give it up now, and I won't have to arrest you."

"I didn't take anything, Dwight."

"Who else could it be? You are the only one with motive."

Toby just sighed and turned back to his desk.

Dwight walked back to report the bad news to Michael. He entered Michael's office, and said glumly, "I'm sorry Michael. I walked past the dangerous plant, I made it through the fiery kitchen, I even avoided Kelly, but I couldn't find your thingy. I know I failed. I only beg you to let me keep my job."

"What?"

Just then Pam came into the office holding the thingy.

Dwight shouted, "Pam! You did it! Swiper! Swiper, no swiping! Swiper, no swiping! Swiper, no swiping!"

Pam just tossed the thingy onto Michael's desk. "Michael, here is your toy back. Toys 'R' Us says they don't do 'sphere calibration' or whatever it was you wanted." Pam walked out, without waiting for the next pointless errand Michael wanted her to run.

"Um… okay. Good job, Dwight. Mystery solved. You can keep your job."

* * *

A/N:

The thingy: (his little expandable sphere)

I know there is no Boots to Dwight's Dora, but I couldn't figure out how to work that in.

So, yeah. Weird stuff happens to my brain while babysitting. I believe this is the fourth "Office + babysitting this" fic.


End file.
